RPC-427

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Registered Phenomena Code: 427

Object Class: Neutralized

Hazard Types: None

Containment Protocols: RPC-427 is stored in a padded, climate-controlled White-level containment strongbox on Site-016. As per Office of Analysis and Science Teleological Security Protocol 01, further testing on RPC-427 is forbidden.

Description: RPC-427 is a Type-3¹ Out-of-Place Artifact (OPA) dating to approximately 1640 CE. RPC-427 is the result of LO-011 passing through a temporal predestination paradox.

3R/DHPS Clearance Accepted

Database Entry Introduction:
The following is a digitized partial transcript of the original containment document for RPC-427, created on the 2nd of February 1461. The formatting has been preserved to be comparable with Auctoritas Imperata archival documents of this period. The document has been translated from the original ecclesiastical Latin. Where useful, contextual explanations have been included. Due to the extreme length of the original document, a substantial amount of extraneous material has been omitted.

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For the Honour of His Holiness Pius II, Bishop of Rome, Vicar of Jesus Christ, Successor of the Prince of the Apostles, Supreme Pontiff of the Universal Church, Primate of Italy, Archbishop and Metropolitan of the Roman Province, Sovereign of the Vatican City State, Servant of the servants of God.

An Inquest of the Auctoritas Imperata into Anomalia Supernaturalis XXVII

Completed on the 24th of Januarius, Anno Domini 1460²

Composed by Father G. Giovanni, Auctoritas Collegium Romae

Do not use this parchment for writing, I will finish it later. Brother Douglas of Edinburgh.
  Chapter 1: The Nature of the Anomalia
  Chapter 2: Where the Anomalia was Found
  Chapter 3: The Characteristics of the Anomalia
  Chapter 4: How the Anomalia is to be Guarded
  Chapter 5: Commentaries

Chapter 1: The Nature of the Anomalia

[1] The Grace of the Lord our God has, upon this earth, produced many strange and wondrous substances, beasts and persons which, by their unusual actions and attributes must be admitted as Anomalia Supernaturalis, that which exists outside the realm of reasoned understanding. The Will of God dictates that some of these Anomalia are for the good of His children, while some exist for their own purposes, and others exist to tempt and betray, and to remind us, sinners all, how easily we may be drawn from the path of humble faith and into the realms of darkness and corruption. Some, by their construction or shape hide their true natures from an enquiring mind.

Vita hominum altos recessus magnasque latebras habet.³

[2] Thus we must in understanding this particular Anomalia, seek by our God-given reason to comprehend what purpose it serves and whether it is of a hindrance to our holy works or a blessing sent from Above to guide us, and our holy Church, to the sacred realms of understanding and wisdom in the image of the Lord.⁴ [EXTRANEOUS MATERIAL OMITTED]

[45] Whereas: it has not yet harmed any of our scholars, and, when left alone, produces no unexpected actions save for strange lights and sounds.
[46] Whereas: the writings and texts it can produce are as yet unintelligible, though written in our alphabet, and produce no signs of demoniac influence on the reader.⁵
[47] Whereas: it is composed of unknown materials in addition to mundane metals and glass, but said materials do not have a corrosive, aggressive or alchemic influence of any kind.
[48] Whereas: it does not respond in any way to the presence of blessed materials, objects of faith, curses, magical interventions and indeed shows little will or intellect dependent upon itself, but endeavors to produce illumination and speech in heavenly language
[49] Thus: the authors of this report suggest that it is Virtuous, with the Cardinal Virtue of Industria⁶, for it does not act, does not harm, and projects effects which by their glory and illumination do not distract or misdirect from the world and the truth of God, but increase of its magnificence, and shows no motive force or will to motion of its own. In light of the scale of these effects, which cannot injure a man, merely surprise or distract, it is thus classed Minoris.
[50] To conclude, we name it Anomalia Supernaturalis XXVII, Industria-Minoris⁷

[EXTRANEOUS MATERIAL OMITTED]

Chapter 2: Where the Anomalia was Found

[EXTRANEOUS MATERIAL OMITTED]

[3] These Norwegian traders told Father Bruttenholm that, five months prior, they had been encamped upon a beach in southern Groenland, a territory of the Norwegian crown far across the Western Ocean in the northern reaches where the ice does not depart. They had, in the night, heard a strange buzzing and seen peculiar dancing lights at the edge of the water, and had found the object floating in the surf. They claimed that, despite floating in water in which ice still resided, the object was warm to the touch as if it had been held in the palm of some stranger's hand. One of the traders said that briefly he had seen a brilliant light under the sea, as if lightning had struck at the bottom of the ocean, but his companions would not confirm this peculiar tale.
[4] When they drew it from the water, it was surrounded by a caul or sack of a clear material they said felt like gut or fine sealskin- cutting it with a knife, they found the object to be dry despite its immersion. Regrettably, Father Bruttenholm has stated in his missive that the traders lost the caul during their voyage to Norway, but alas, they knew not what they bore.
[4] Determining this to be a clear Anomalia, and that it seemed to pose minor risk, Father Bruttenholm had the object sealed in a small cask, and paid a Frisian merchant to bring it south from Bergan, where the good Father resides, and then to deliver it to our mercantile agents in Lubeck. It was brought to the Church of Saint Barbara⁸ on the 3rd of August of last year.⁹

[EXTRANEOUS MATERIAL OMITTED]

Chapter 3: Characteristics of the Anomalia

[1] XVII is an item in size not unlike a trencher of bread¹⁰. Its weight permits it to rest easily in the hand, and it contains no detached or moving parts. The object is on the whole composed of a single band of solid metal- it responds to lodestones as if it were steel, but of a make and fineness unknown to us. We are not yet sure if it was wrought by the hand of Man. Its top and bottom faces are composed of a material which resembles glass, but of unnatural thinness. The material can be cracked, though with great difficulty, by physical blows.¹¹
[2] The upper face of XVII bears a horizontal depression about the width of a thumb, containing a fine metal grille-work. It is from this space that the device emits peculiar noises. Directly below the slit is a round depression, which can be pushed upon to cause the glass of the upper face to emit light and create images. Three small protrusions are present on the left edge, protruding through holes in the metal. The upper protrusion is of a size slightly greater than the lower two.
[3] The upper protrusion can be depressed to cause XVII to cease emitting light and sound. The lower two protrusions can be depressed to cause the object to emit sounds. The upper of the two lower protrusions increases the force of the sound, while the bottom decreases it, to the point of silence. Pressing this second lower protrusion a further time causes the object to emit a great buzzing, as a hornet's nest or hive of bees, and vibrate as if struck.
[4] A small rectangular hole is present on the bottom edge of the object, containing several delicate metal components which appear to be adorned with bronze or brass. Next to them is a circular hole, lined with two interlocking rings of steel.
[5] When illuminated, the upper face of the device shows images of writing and strange pictures, some of which possess the innate property of movement or change over time. Touching the upper face of the device with a hand or an implement made of leather may cause the images to move or change, and can cause the production of sounds, a change in the tone of sounds, or wholly new sounds to begin. The writing is in the Latin alphabet, though in a language or spelling utterly unfamiliar to us.
[6] The sounds produced are varying- some resemble music, or song, or monstrous noise. They may grow soft or loud. We have yet to understand the language. We speculate that it must be some holy language, for is it not written:

Signa autem eos qui crediderint haec sequentur in nomine meo daemonia eicient linguis loquentur novis¹²

[TRANSCRIPT EXCERPT ENDS, 257 PAGES OMITTED.]

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This document is a Provisional Containment Document. Changes will be saved automatically.

Registered Phenomena Code: 427

Object Class: Alpha-White (Note: should we reclassify as an LAO? This thing doesn't seem to merit a Phenomena Code. Neutralized? Check with Research.)

Hazard Types: Temporal Hazard (Note: Is this Tychokinetic?)

Containment Protocols: (FINISH THESE)

• White-class containment locker, Site-016 Alpha wing
• Climate/temperature controls- minimize humidity levels whenever possible
• Vibration protection- follow up with Research on structural instability, risk of overheat/fire? Will the buttons fall off?
• Does a Neutralized object need a containment- reference that containment team in Africa with those nuclear cave things.
• HANDLE WITH CARE IT'S 600 YEARS OLD

Description: RPC-427 is an anomalous iPhone 5S smartphone which was recovered by the Auctoritas Imperata in

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From: rtni.610etis|nossranugm#rtni.610etis|nossranugm
To: rtni.610etis|iabimhskalj#rtni.610etis|iabimhskalj
Subject: LAO cell phone?
Japna,

Question for the LAO team. Do we have any lesser-anomalous cellphones on the Site right now? Or in the database generally?
Thanks for coming to the potluck last week. The Containment guys are still raving about how good that curry was.

Magnus

From: rtni.610etis|iabimhskalj#rtni.610etis|iabimhskalj
To: rtni.610etis|nossranugm#rtni.610etis|nossranugm
cc: rtni.610etis|snevetst#rtni.610etis|snevetst, rtni.610etis|gnahzy#rtni.610etis|gnahzy
Subject: Re: LAO cell phone?
Magnus,

It's good, right? Old family recipe. I'll tell my mom the guys at work liked it, hahahah. As for cell phones- we've got three at the moment. LO-006 is a Samsung A6 that makes explosion noises, LO-011 is an iPhone with an infinite battery life, and LO-074 is an indestructible Nokia.

What do you need these for?

Japna

From: rtni.610etis|nossranugm#rtni.610etis|nossranugm
To: rtni.610etis|iabimhskalj#rtni.610etis|iabimhskalj
Subject: Re:Re:LAO cell phone?

Can you pull LO-011 out of storage for me ASAP? I need to check something.

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Unusual Containment Circumstances Addendum: On ██/██/2019, Site-016 Researcher Magnus Gunarsson, who was drafting new containment documents for RPC-427, a chronologically displaced cellular telephone which had been in Authority custody since the 15th century, introduced the object to the presence of LO-011, a Lesser Anomaly in the form of a cellular telephone with an unlimited battery life. The incident occurred in the lab overseen by Dr. Japna Lakshmibai, Site-016 Lesser Anomaly Research Team head. The following is an audio transcript from recordings by lab monitoring equipment.

Gunarsson: Do you have an open desk space I could set this thing down on? It's fragile as hell.

Lakshmibai: whistles Jesus, what happened to that thing? It's falling apart.

G: Japna, let me introduce RPC-427, newly re-designated Alpha-White. You know how the Authority used to be, like, run by the Catholic Church?

L: Yeah…?

G: I have a freaking grimoire talking about a Norwegian priest buying this thing from traders in sixteen fourty-something.

L: Well damn. Where'd they find it?

G: Somewhere off the coast of Greenland. Not far from here, come to think of it. But how would an iPhone end up in Greenland on-

L: Magnus. Magnus!

G: Jesus, what?

L: The phone, Magnus. Where's the damn phone?

G: It's right here in the case.

L: No, not that one- the LAO. It was on the desk right here. In a vacuum bag.

G: What?

L: Magnus, I put the bag there ten seconds before you walked in.

At the time of this event, researchers in an adjacent workspace were engaged in routine calibration work on RPC-███, a Theta-White anomaly with the capacity to detect temporal variations as a side effect of its natural [REDACTED] mildly caustic byproducts. The entity registered a temporal displacement consistent with an object occupying a volume of space of less than 29 cm³ engaged in a negative temporal displacement of 500±100 solar years.¹³

LO-011 is to be considered irrevocably lost, while research on RPC-427, and its individual history, is ongoing.

Footnotes

1. Type 3: Human-Constructed/Human-Used/Discovered

2. In the Julian calendar. Gregorian date-equivalent is the 2nd of February, 1461.

3. "Character lies more concealed, and out of the reach of common knowledge." Pliny the Younger, Letters, Book III

4. "Extensive philosophical preambles to containment documents were considered mandatory in the early Auctoritas, both as an establishment of the intellectual and dogmatic rigour of the person or persons composing the document, but also as a screen or disguise for any sensitive information contained within- the theory being that if a containment document involved a single page of harmful information, surrounding it with 200 pages of theological and philosophical padding made it less likely for someone to stumble upon the dangerous elements by chance." -Rothmann and DuBois, Structural Analysis of Auctoritas Imperata Containment Documents, Directorate of Historical and Pseudohistorical Studies, 1970.

5. "Demonic possession" was a frequent catch-word for what would now be defined as memetic or infohazardous material.

6. Literally "diligence", meaning persistence and effortfulness.

7. The Auctoritas used a classification system based around the chief "sin" or "virtue" of an object or entity. Sinful entites were deemed to be useless or harmful, while Virtuous entities were deemed to be beneficial or helpful. Industria, or Diligent entities, roughly corresponded with modern Theta containment ratings, for objects which anomalously produced resources, items, or effects believed to be compatible with Christian doctrine. The "severity" rating, in this case Minoris, indicated the extent, degree of strength, and consistency of an object's Virtue or Sin. The idea of a hazard classification system was not proposed until the mid-17th century, with efforts to systematize the Auctoritas' record-keeping.

8. Santa Barbara dei Libra, the church in Rome whose catacombs formed the central headquarters of the Auctoritas during the 15th and 16th centuries.

9. The 13th of August, 1640, by the Gregorian calendar.

10. Before the 18th century, Auctoritas documents tended not to use units of measurement for small objects.

11. Destructive testing was a common element of Auctoritas procedure, frequently resulting in the destruction of, or severe damage to entities and artifacts.

12. "And these signs shall follow them that believe; In my name shall they cast out devils; they shall speak with new tongues," Mark 16:17

13. RPC-███'s characteristics make it more suitable for tracking the temporal displacement of objects of considerable mass. The entity is primarily used to assist with containment of a variety of large temporally-related anomalies, notable [REDACTED]

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