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2045-YA. The high-intensity reflections are due to its surface of solid gold.
Registered Phenomena Code: RPC-334-NC
Object Class: Omega-Black Presumed Neutralized, Pending
Hazard Types: Extra-Terrestrial Hazard, Titanic Hazard, Climatological Hazard, Geological Hazard, Ecological Hazard
Containment Protocols: Any details of RPC-334-NC outside of the supplied media narrative are to be safeguarded from greater understanding via routine suppression and intimidation tactics. See Operation World Mockingbird Vol. II and Fundamental Gangstalking & Gaslighting Tactics for Continued Peace & Prosperity, Vol. III (UN International Library) for details of these standardized protocols, respectively.
Description: RPC-334-NC is the designation given to a near-miss, potential extinction-level event on Earth in the year 2045. RPC-334-NC was heralded by the identification of 2045-YA (aka NEO1 2045BYYA-1839), a low-orbit asteroid 2.3km in diameter that was set to dip below Earth's satellites in late January, but was calculated to pass through uninterrupted by a terrestrial impact.
On the evening of January 20th, 2045, 2045-YA changed its course to turn towards Earth. However, its descent was suspended, and an impact avoided, by ill-understood and anomalous means that have not been elucidated to this day. GD-level representation has declined to comment on the incident. The use of Authority-native anomalies in RPC-334-NC cannot be ruled out.
Addenda
Initial Discovery Report
December 2044NASA/TM-2044-213758
December 2044NASA/TM-2044-213758Comet/Asteroid Protection System (CAPS): Preliminary Space-Based System Concept and Study Results - Initial Analysis
Daniel D. ██████, Carlos M.████████, and Jeffrey ██████ Langley Research Center, Hampton, Virginia
████-█████ Park, Robert H. █████, and James C. ██████ Swales Aerospace, Inc., Hampton, Virginia
Douglas G. ██████, James A. ███████, Renjith R. █████, and Hans ███████ Analytical Mechanics Associates, Inc., Hampton, Virginia
Linda ██-███████and Martin R. ██████ Joint Institute for Advancement of Flight Sciences (JIAFS)The George Washington University, Hampton, Virginia
Matthew A. ███████ Colorado Center for Astrodynamics Research The University of Colorado, Boulder, Colorado
Jana L. ███████ San Diego State University, San Diego, California
The object is approaching Earth with an approximate velocity of 18 km/s, calculated to pass within 0.001 AU2 of the surface. This will avoid impact and likely cause mild perturbations in satellite communications, which will be the concern of the private sector and should not represent situations of national security for nation-states. Thus, no aid or preventative measures will be taken on behalf of this private sector.
The surface composition of the object is estimated to be 90% gold, 3% diamond, and 7% various mundane metals.
Sub and supra-orbital satellite arrays will follow the trajectory and sequence images for historical and scientific records.
REP. STEWARD: … are we technologically capable of preventing it? That old coot.
DR. A'BEARN: Only by force, really. There's no way to counter him with non-ballistic technology. I’d put any other tech option at a less-than 2% chance of success.
REP. KRATTER: Doing that would be waging an interplanetary war on a private citizen. And his company. Elderly and in need of death as they both are.
REP. STEWARD: The loon is endangering the whole planet. For what? For his greed? His cocksureness? We’re just gonna roll over and be okay with that?
REP. YUNG: Can we not appeal to the people? Don't they know they are in danger? Maybe a crisis narrative is needed here. Let the fearmongering run a little hot. I can have one whipped up overnight.
REP. KRATTER: And who would you recruit for that? My teams are spread too thin as it stands.
REP. YUNG: There are mediums other than your ICBS.3 Same team who popularized financial privacy as a societal danger.
REP. KRATTER: Oh, wow. Yeah, them. I’m just not so sure about that this time. He’s got the first-mover benefit on the public sentiment. Here's his latest mass message to his followers: "There is enough gold on 2045-YA to make everyone on the plant a multi-billionaire; 10.2 billion UDA each to be specific."4
REP. FOLMOUNX: Is that correct?
DR. A'BEARN: Mathematically, sure. Economically? No. It doesn't make sense because the price of gold would plummet on the market. Probably around 90-95% depreciation.
REP. STEWARD: ████ would still make a fortune, though. Another one for the bastard.
DR. A'BEARN: We'd witness the first… let's see… octillionaire…
REP. KRATTER: We can turn off his UDA? That should put him back in line. Why can’t we ban gold, like we did with all other forms of money?
REP. YUNG: If we bankrupt him, it’ll be more incentive for him to mine the gold. And we’ve never done such a public economic assassination. He’s too visible. The best play is to move public perception. Always has been. Why can't we explain this to the people who love this idea? Why are they celebrating in the streets for this?
REP. STEWARD: I heard several religions have cropped up over it. Can you imagine the sort of person who reveres that man?
REP. YUNG: Psychotronics5 are a possibility if they can’t be convinced through narrative.
REP. KRATTER: Your tickle toys aren’t that strong, Yung. C’mon. What do you think the average person is going to really listen to? A lesson in fundamental economics, or the most famous and influential technologist's assurance of an easy 10 billion? You think a few microwaves are going to disincentivize half of the of the population from getting rich?
REP. STEWARD: He's right; there's not really a way we can crash this irrational exuberance with education, whether direct or subliminal. Absolutely not by shouting the basic laws of supply and demand. Money is the exciting part. The economics behind it are boring as hell, and no one cares to learn. Shoot, that’s how we operate, fellas. Wouldn’t have it any other way.
REP. KRATTER: What a scam. All over a bunch of shiny rocks. Are we sure that this is even possible? Does his technology work? How safe and reliable is it?
Dr. A'BEARN: It's reliable. But that's not to say it is safe. I'd put the probability of it stopping and suspending the asteroid close to 80%. The chance of it staying there? More like 5% or less.
REP. FOLMOUNX: Easy to be so greedy when it isn’t your planet that is the collateral.
REP. STEWARD: He's the madman who will kill us all just to see his account numbers go up. Doesn’t he have enough already? Richer than any of our sorry asses. Six times my net worth. And I just got my chef to start putting those thin gold leaves in my steak burgers this week. Right between the meat and the bun.
REP. FOLMOUNX: Does that mean you are looking forward to the asteroid mining?
REP. STEWARD: Hell no.
REP. FOLMOUNX: Why not?
REP. YUNG: This really isn’t relevant. This is a distraction.
REP. STEWARD: Cause it tastes like shit, that’s why.
REP. FOLMOUNX: Well then wh—no, no I want to know, seriously, hold on for just for a second here. You Americans are so excessive. You put up with something you don’t like the taste of just to get a second-hand high off how superior it makes you feel. Is that right?
REP. STEWARD: Yep. That’s about right. Ever heard of truffles?6
REP. FOLMOUNX: Yeah okay. You make me sick. Just wanted to bring that up cause I know you voted against the new clean energy expansion.7 You’re a wasteful man. I like truffles by the way.
REP. STEWARD: Sure, of course you do. A man of your size can be assumed to like eating most things. You don’t get to say that, sitting at this table. In this room. In that uniform.
REP. KRATTER: Can we move on now? We have a more important disagreement to attend to.
REP. STEWARD: That’s right. You got to think he’s way worse than I am, any way you slice it. I hear he has a gold-plated digital scoreboard from a football stadium behind his desk in his office that just displays his net worth 24/7.
REP. FOLMOUNX: Hm. Who could have known he is dangerously psychotic?
REP. KRATTER: What's the point in selling when the potential buyers are all dead? Surely he thinks of this.
DR. A'BEARN: Is there any way we can stop him with policy somehow? Some legislation or sanctions?
REP. STEWARD: God that’s adorable. Can we have scientists join us more often?
REP. KRATTER: The answer to your question is no, he is outside of any jurisdiction because technically he is on Mars. We’d be out of our mandate. Pretty flagrantly.
REP. YUNG: We can always take that step, though. We already should have, honestly. I can't believe not one of us was able to work with him. No omni-governmental representation on Mars.
DR. A'BEARN: It’s easy to believe. That's decentralization for you. Blame the blockchain.8
REP. STEWARD: I think an all-out military offensive is the only answer here, damn the optics. Flex our muscles and see who, if anyone, still wants to tango. We have the weapons.
DR. A'BEARN: Forgive my adorable science, but it's not that easy. If he successfully docks the asteroid with his satellites for his equipment to mine, and we ruin it for him, we guarantee precipitating a payload the equivalent of around… 1,000 nuclear bombs, all around the globe. You know what happens when you blow up a large asteroid… oh, maybe you don’t. You watch a lot of movies? The movies got that one right. A thousand pin-pricks will kill just as surely as a major blow to the head. Maybe just slower. More agonizing too.
REP. FOLMOUNX: Not the payday they are expecting.
REP. STEWARD: So we literally can't do a single goddamn thing?
REP. KRATTER: This is the consequence of letting the private sector best us in technology.
REP. YUNG: We can push for more control over the private sector if we can avoid this crisis.
REP. KRATTER: We'll get the OmniPres9 to decry it via the ICBS and that'll be that. An easy sell. But a hard job to tackle first.
REP. YUNG: We need to notify Anomalous and Paranatural Affairs. They can help bend the arm of RPC and maybe use something of theirs here.
REP. FOLMOUNX: That's a good idea I think.
REP. STEWARD: I hate giving those hold-outs validation. I thought the whole point of this was to dissolve them. What was the point of censoring their funds then? Might as well let them have their own cryptocurrency again.
REP. KRATTER: All in favor? We'll use our governance tokens to vote.
REP. KRATTER: Alright, we're in agreement then. My men will draft a notice to them. Is Hopkins still up there? He's an easy one to move with the money. Let’s create an account for that. Keep your comm channels open.
REP. STEWARD: And your assholes tight.
Site-002, Dir. of Site
<002-director-burn-account-2381B@authority.rpc>
To: <gro.CAANU|snikpoHB#gro.CAANU|snikpoHB>
Sent: 8:00 AM, December 12, 2044
Subject: RE: NOTICE - URGENT
My colleagues and I must unfortunately react to this demand for our intervention with quite a bit of deserved disdain. It’s barely scratching the surface to say that our organizations are not on good terms right now. That we can with no irony be so callously called upon to be the saviors of the Earth after being the subject of your vilification campaign, as well as a nauseating course of procedural whiplash from the UNAAC's regulations on our continued operations over the last 6 months is, frankly, astounding to us.
We are fully aware of the cabal of individuals and interests within your organization that wish to scuttle away the responsibility and power that the RPC Authority represents for global security.10 We cannot remove that understanding from the equation when calculating how to respond to this, and if we should at all.
Failing the task will mean an ostensible point that those who decry the Authority can point to as justification for such a removal of power. Whether a genuine request or not, this is just the sort of low-likelihood and high-profile ask that the cabal would be looking for. Succeeding would give naysayers a reason to curb the immense power we may or may not yield. Given Mr. █████’s ample collaboration with the UN over its continued centralization of regulatory power (I suppose up until this point), this feels remarkably like a set up.
All that aside, and on a more personal note, do you think we stockpile anomalies that might one day tailor-fit your problems? Do you think you can just purchase your problems away? There is no such miracle anomaly, and no such price tag.
Theoretically, we could attempt ranged cognitohazardous agents to dissuade Mr. ████'s intentions, but the general effect is not as precise as you probably are hoping, and will more than likely lead to a neurodegeneration that could cause God knows how much more damage than what we are potentially already looking at. Do not make a madman dumber.
You confuse what and who we are, asking us to do the opposite of what we are designed to do. We are not the heroes of the Earth. We are not releasing or deploying anything. We do not have the power to fix this. To hell with your donation. Keep it. We have what is important and truly valuable — our people – insured against this threat. We will not extend the courtesy when it is so ill-fitting. And so be it.
GD-ARCH
>>05:39 UTC<<: 2045-YA is seen from multiple live feeds. Its surface illuminates slightly as it skirts the atmosphere of the Earth. The surface is a brilliant gold.
>>07:43 UTC<<: Contact is made with the outer orbital of high-shell satellite arrays, obliterating numerous units which were unable to be recalled. Small GPS and etcetera communications interruptions occur throughout the Earth.
>>10:15 UTC<<: ██████ Inc anti-projectile fleets are engaged. They match the velocity of 2045-YA and enclose it.
>>14:02 UTC<<: The velocity of 2045-YA is slowed dramatically. It is soon in geosynchronous orbit with the Earth, elevated at ~120,000 km above the surface.
>>18:26 UTC<<: ██████ Inc mining equipment arrives at 2045-YA and lands on its surface.
>>19:31 UTC<<: An explosion (presumed nuclear) occurs on the obverse side of 2045-YA. The force propels it towards Earth.
>>22:15 UTC<<: 2045-YA enters the Earth's atmosphere. The ██████ Inc equipment is incinerated in the descent.
>>23:50 UTC<<: 2045-YA abruptly stops its descent. It is stationary approximately 5500m above the surface.11 The source of the resistance is not clear and defies technical analysis. The heat absorbed by the upper atmosphere renders a 100km2 radius on the surface a Level 5 Radiation Exposure Zone. An unusually large concentration of the populous in this area at this time suffer immediate 2nd degree burns and mild radiation poisoning, per on-ground reports.
>>03:50+1 UTC<<: 2045-YA is suddenly and forcefully ejected out of the Earth's atmosphere. It accelerates continuously and nearly impacts Mars, shedding several satellites from its orbit in the process. By 10 AU away from Earth,12 2045-YA is approaching luminal speeds, and soon is beyond the means of further detection.
>>05:14+1 UTC<<: Commercial satellites re-position themselves into outer orbit. GPS and comms outages resolved.
Previous Entries13
Registered Phenomena Code: RPC-334-NC
Object Class: Beta-Black [NEUTRALIZED]
Hazard Types: Extra-terrestrial Hazard, Destabilization Hazard
Containment Protocols: RPC-334-NC is to be contained via split-custodial management of its public and private keys. Its code is to be studied in read-only mode and solely for educational purposes. Testing is not allowed at this time.
Description: RPC-334-NC is a synthetic, derivative and digitally tokenized asset, or cryptocurrency, of alien origin. Its code, while decipherable, is in a language unknown to modern day computer science.
The underlying code, or smart contract,14 allows RPC-334-NC’s value to be "pegged" to anything imaginable by the programmer; any asset, number (whether naturally occurring15 or artificial16), physical process,17 or anything that can be defined within the code. The programming language of RPC-334-NC is Turing-complete, which means that the number of potential denominators, or "pegs", for RPC-334-NC is infinite and includes the set of anything in the universe.
RPC-334-NC is swap-compatible with standardized cryptocurrencies developed on Earth.18 This is not taken to be a direct communicative attempt by the anonymous authoring alien intelligence, as the compatibility is a matter of rudimentary quantum computation.
Because of RPC-334-NC's compatibility with human digital assets, cryptocurrencies that have established value in a market on Earth can be "invested" into RPC-334-NC. Like a trading chart of a non-anomalous asset, for example a company's stock, when capital is invested into RPC-334-NC’s smart contract, its "price" rises. Likewise, when capital is removed RPC-334-NC’s "price" decreases.
This feature results in the ability to physically manipulate reality, given capital. For example, if programmed to be pegged to the total surface area of the coral reefs in the world, investing cryptocurrencies into RPC-334-NC's smart contract anomalously increases the total surface area of the coral reefs in known and observed waters. Conversely, withdrawing funds from the smart contract decreases the total surface area.
Testing with [DATA REDACTED] has confirmed that if an amount of capital invested into RPC-334-NC is withdrawn totally and suddenly, the object that is the peg of RPC-334-NC at that time will cease to exist.19
Furthermore, the parameters of RPC-334-NC can be specified to characteristics of what it is pegged to. For example, RPC-334-NC can be pegged not only to a rubber ball in Testing Chamber 012, but more specifically to its gravitational potential energy. Thus, when cryptocurrency is invested into RPC-334-NC in this case, it rises in height; when cryptocurrency is withdrawn from RPC-334-NC in this case, it descends.20
Discussion is ongoing as to the use cases for RPC-334-NC, although ethical precedent would suggest that there is likely no justification.
No, you're right. They didn't deserve it. But the rest of us did. We basically said what the hell do we have to lose at this point, the whole world has gone insane. So, we pegged it to the thing's stellar trajectory. We made it fly very close to Mars, too… just to scare the hell out of him and his… followers. It took about 100 trillion UDA. Talk about collateral! What? No, of course not. God no. Not ours. Theirs. That was the easy part, thanks to the The Department of Cryptology. Like taking candy from a baby. All the crying that goes with it too.
How? Well, it turns out that the alien crypto can be pegged to itself. We put some funds into it and took it all back out. Effectively burnt it. Hate to see it go, but that was too dangerous in the wrong hands also.
So, in one move, we launched an asteroid out of here when it was practically kissing the world goodbye, deflated the world's aching currency to help make everyone's hard-earned money mean something again, and got rid of the evidence. I think we deserve a pat on the back don’t you?
People won't know it though. Maybe a few will notice it at the checkout line getting groceries over the next years. Maybe a few will wonder why the appraisal for their house is suddenly lower. Why their stocks are too. They will forever think they missed out on 10 billion when they and their children are getting more than that back over time. People think he was responsible… he's the only one who could theoretically have the technology, so. As far as they’re aware. I think he’s lost trillions in net worth. A bit of ironic karma.
But yeah, we’ve made what money they do have more valuable. They don't know it, but their purchasing power has been restored in a significant way. Inflation is a silent tax, as you know.
No, not necessarily. All is not lost. We learned the alien programming language before we pulled it. I'm not sure we could recreate the token, but I'm not sure we'd want to either. We have used it to enhance the cryptography of our informational security levels though. No way in hell the UNAAC is getting their prying eyes in here ever again.
What happened to the withdrawn funds? Good question. Don’t ask me. Out of the UN’s grubby hands and out of circulation. That is all that matters. Maybe they will think twice about printing so much unpegged money to enrich themselves at the expense of the common man.
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