4 stars



RPC-071 in an inactive state.

Registered Phenomena Code: 071

Object Class: Alpha-Black

Hazard Types: h-sapient.png Sapient Hazard h-immeasurable.png Immeasurable Hazard

Containment Protocol: Following the death of the previous individual designated RPC-071-2, RPC-071 is considered inactive. RPC-071 is to be kept in a hermetically-sealed safe in the Section 4 Storage Room in Site-002, only accessible to Authority personnel with Level 4 Clearance or higher. Under no circumstances is RPC-071 to be reactivated without proper approval. Any attempts to access RPC-071 without Regional Command approval are to be met with immediate termination.

Reactivation of RPC-071 for research or ███████ ██████████████ purposes must be approved by at least two Global Directors. The next iteration of RPC-071-2 must be appointed by Global Command and is to be terminated after attempting the necessary protocols in order to return RPC-071 to its inactive state.

Description: RPC-071 is a standard brass oil lamp, measuring 0.3 meters in length and 0.15 meters in width. Authority archaeologists have dated RPC-071 to approximately 1000 A.D, with parts originating from various countries.

The anomalous properties of RPC-071 manifest when the body of the lamp is rubbed by an individual human being. After the subject ceases rubbing the lamp, RPC-071 will produce a cloud of thick white smoke and an entity designated RPC-071-1 will emerge from the spout of RPC-071. After an individual causes RPC-071-1 to manifest, the individual is referred to as the current instance of RPC-071-2 until their death, upon which RPC-071 will re-enter an inactive state.

RPC-071-1 takes the form of a large, bare-chested man of Arabian descent. The torso, arms, and head of RPC-071-1 resemble a human being, but the lower half of RPC-071-1 is obscured by a thick cloud of white smoke that appears to lead from RPC-071. RPC-071-1 has displayed reality-bending capabilities on multiple occasions, but to date expresses that he may only use them at the command of RPC-071-2 to grant their desires.

RPC-071-1 displays an extremely lethargic personality, and will often procrastinate to extreme lengths when following the commands of RPC-071-2. While RPC-071-1 will eventually follow through with these commands, Authority researchers have noticed that RPC-071-1 tends to put off following commands for long periods of time, ranging from hours to months before the command is carried out. RPC-071-1 is also extremely specific about the phrasing and terminology used during these commands. It is unknown whether this is due to the abilities placing a strain on the anomaly or RPC-071-1 simply attempting to minimize the effort required to follow the command. Likewise, if a request is deemed to be beyond RPC-071-1's abilities, the request will promptly be denied.

Discovery: RPC-071 was first discovered in Baghdad, Iraq, after reports of a "magic lamp" came to the Authority's attention. Anomalous activity surrounding the city was traced back to a singular individual, who upon Authority interrogation revealed RPC-071 as the source of these events. The individual, one ████████ ████, was promptly taken into custody and questioned regarding the events surrounding him, eventually admitting to the existence of RPC-071 as their source. Following this admission, RPC-071 was successfully retrieved and ████ was administered Class-A amnestics.

RPC-071 remained inactive until the summer of ████ when during a routine polishing RPC-071-1 manifested and offered its services to CSD-2918. Approximately one day before this event, the Authority received a news report from Baghdad that the previous instance of RPC-071-2 was murdered during a drive-by shooting. It is theorized that the death of the last instance caused RPC-071 to fall into inactivity without an instance of RPC-071-2. Following these events, CSD-2918 was classified as RPC-071-2.

Interview Log 071-1-A

By the directive of Head Researcher Kasim, CSD-2918 was asked to order RPC-071-1 to agree to an interview with Dr. Hamesh of Site-02. Following a typical period of inactivity (approximately two months), RPC-071-1 reappeared and acquiesced to CSD-2918's command.

<Begin Log>

Dr. Hamesh: Thank you for finally agreeing to speak with us, RPC-071-1.

RPC-071-1: Yes, well… it was not a difficult request. You simply had to ask my master to make me do so. I am surprised 'men of science' like yourselves did not think of that sooner.

Dr. Hamesh: … Ah. They did tell me you had a bit of an attitude. Let's get on with the questions. Please, if you can, what exactly are you?

RPC-071-1: I suppose that is a fair question. Beings such as myself have been called many names by you mortals- Djinn, Genie, Ifrit… you may call me whichever you see fit.

Dr. Hamesh: I see. Most of us are more familiar with the term Genie, so let's just use that. Where did you come from?

RPC-071-1: *RPC-071-1 yawns* Such trite topics. I do wish you humans would ask more interesting questions. But I suppose I don't have much better to do. However, I cannot fully answer that question. Why should I solve the puzzle for you when you already hold a piece in your hands?

Dr. Hamesh: A piece of the puzzle- do you mean RPC-071?

RPC-071-1: If by this you mean the lamp, yes. My origins, however, are less of a straightforward answer. The life of my kin is a curious one in that we are unaware of our existence until our first master calls. I imagine you realize that this applies to me as well.

Dr. Hamesh: And who was your first master?

RPC-071-1: The first was a child. A young boy from the slums of Baghdad. A fine young man, he was. He did not seek power or rule over the world, but after seeing the extent of my abilities became worried about the prospect of others using me for such purposes. So he kept my existence a secret, asking only for small wishes at a time.

Dr. Hamesh: What did he wish for?

RPC-071-1: My first master was a careful boy- he realized that a sudden rise from a poor trader to a figure of power would be extremely suspicious, especially in those times. He asked for small things, which quickly added up- a gold coin or two in the folds of his robe every day, or a small bit of fine silk in his basket to trade. It was not a life of complete luxury, but it was one of comfort.

Dr. Hamesh: I see. What happened next?

RPC-071-1: A young man became an old man, and my master felt he should not hold on to the lamp forever. I offered him the prospect of immortality, but he would refuse, saying he was happy with the time he had been given. His primary concern in the last days of his life was that my next master would not be as kind as he was and that I might find my way into the hands of a cruel-hearted person. So he buried me in the desert, in hopes his secret would stay hidden from the corrupt. He told his son my location, and soon I awoke with new purpose.

Dr. Hamesh: And it just kept going?

RPC-071-1: Precisely. So the cycle would continue for a millennium: my master would pass on, and a new one would take their place. My first master's son did not remarry but passed it on to a traveling merchant, who used its power to become a warlord. When he was slain in battle it was passed to a trusted advisor, who upon his death willed it to his youngest daughter. Think of it as 'passing on the torch', if you will- if there is a Genie, there must be one to control it. As you have no doubt seen, when my last master ceased to exist, so did I- until a new master was chosen.

Dr. Hamesh: Your last master… I assume that the man we took the lamp from was the latest in the line?

RPC-071-1: Yes. The previous owner of the lamp was, how do you say… less than discreet about my existence. He used my powers frivolously and broke the one constant of the former owners- keeping the source of his fortune hidden. As I expected, this drew the attention of others- particularly those who alerted your Authority. Whether this was from concern or jealousy, I cannot say. You humans are difficult to understand at times, even for one such as I.

Dr. Hamesh: Alright. Here's one that my superiors wanted me to ask. Some of our researchers involved with the project are irritated by your lethargic behavior. If you do possess this amazing power to grant wishes, why do you come off as lazy and unwilling to use it?

RPC-071-1: Irritated? Humph. How direct. Tell me, are your superiors aware of the idea that doing the same thing for enough time can become grating?

Dr. Hamesh: Grating? How?

RPC-071-1: My abilities are certainly phenomenal in nature- but even then there is only so much one can do to entertain themselves when the universe is at their beck and call. if you give a man anything to do, even if it is his favorite activity in the world, he will become tired of it eventually. Perhaps in a year of continuous activity, he will begin to despise what he originally loved. Now, take this idea, and multiply it by several thousand years. An eternity of anything-even bending the fabric of reality- would be tiresome for any individual. Perhaps you would understand if you were the one in this lamp instead of me. I am not 'unwilling' to use my powers, doctor. I simply would prefer to do other things at the moment. Your superiors would be wise to remember not to anger one who can crumble their organization to dust with a flick of the wrist with such petty questions.

Dr. Hamesh: …Right. Moving on. The next question is on the extent of your powers. We're all aware of the devastation you could cause- but we here at the Authority can see that you could be useful in our efforts. I assume your vast knowledge has already given you some understanding of what we do here… could you use your abilities to permanently eliminate some of our, er, more active threats?

RPC-071-1: In some regards, I suppose so. the nature of reality is such that beings of different kinds can exist on different levels. In my case, my powers can only affect more basic realms of reality- such as yours. But some beings, much greater than I, exist on many different levels- several that the mightiest reality shaper could not reach into. Their presence goes unnoticed by other levels- perhaps they are here now, beyond your, or even my, reach, watching, and waiting for their moment to strike. Or maybe, they've already struck, and none of us grasp a high enough understanding of reality to notice. I am strong in your terms, yes, but for many of the things you seek to use me to eliminate, this strength is nothing. Consider it as throwing a pebble and expecting it to level a kingdom.

Dr. Hamesh: Interesting… ok, i have one last question. There's some debate over wether or not most of the wishes you grant actually come true… do they all come true? Or only a few of them?

RPC-071-1: I am a being bound by word. As such, should I say a wish will be granted, it shall. The question is not IF they are granted, but in my case, WHEN.

Dr. Hamesh: When?

RPC-071-1: Precisely. The process of granting a wish does not happen immediately, in most cases- the simpler the wish, the faster it is granted, and often times it will happen in particular or coincidental circumstances. If you wish for one golden coin, perhaps you will find one in your shirt pocket the next time you reach for a pen. But if you wish for a mountain of golden coins, it may take months, or years, before I have the power to grant that request. There is a strong chance you may not live long enough to see the wish come to fruition, and the mountain of coins may one day appear on your grave. It all depends on the size of the wish, as well as the availability of the Genie- and as you have no doubt noticed, there are many I have not yet attended to due to their scale and the effort it would take. You have my guarantee that your wish will indeed come true every time my powers are used- eventually.

Dr. Hamesh proceeds to review notes. RPC-071-1 yawns once again.

RPC-071-1: Are we quite finished? It is almost time for my programs.

Dr. Hamesh: Programs?

RPC-071-1: I do enjoy your 'television'. Being immortal does tend to allow one sufficient time to catch up on what you refer to as 'soap operas'.

Dr. Hamesh: Soap Operas? Well, okay then. We've already gotten through the questions, so I suppose we can let you go. Thanks for your cooperation, RPC-071-1.

RPC-071-1: Yes, yes. You're welcome. Now, if you'll excuse me…

A cloud of white smoke surrounds RPC-071-1, and promptly retreats into RPC-071. For one hour following the interview, soft noises can be heard from inside RPC-071. Cross-referencing recorded audio has identified the sounds as quotes from episodes of television show 'The Young and The Restless'.

<End Log>

Closing Statement: Approximately four days after the interview session, Dr. Hamesh attempted to speak with CSD-2918 regarding using RPC-071-1 as part of a Global Command-approved neutralization effort regarding RPC-███. Despite the command of CSD-2918, RPC-071-1 did not appear, and loud sounds similar to a person snoring could be heard coming from inside RPC-071. This period of inactivity lasted three months. Following this lull period, RPC-071-1 suddenly reemerged during routine testing with CSD-2918, and the following conversation was recorded:

A loud yawn can be heard in the containment chamber before RPC-071-1 emerges from RPC-071 in a cloud of white smoke, startling the researchers and CSD-2918.

CSD-2918: Gah! What the hell?

RPC-071-1: Aah…that was a wonderful rest. Apologies for not being able to heed your call before. Now tell me, master, did you still desire me to grant your wish?

CSD-2918: If you were asleep, then how do you know I….wait, grant what now? I don't remember which wish you're talking about.

RPC-071-1: I suppose not then. A shame. Oh, well. Back to the lamp. Perhaps I can use this opportunity to grant some I have not completed yet. I wonder if young Alkar would still like a wife?

RPC-071-1 quickly retreats into RPC-071. Following this incident, RPC-071 became unresponsive for a period of five days. After this period, Authority agents intercepted a news report from Syria published an analysis of an unusual occurrence where an unidentified woman was found buried alive in the grave of one Mr. Tomas Alkar, who passed away in 1867 of a heart attack. It is assumed that Mr. Alkar was once an instance of RPC-071-2, who had made a wish that RPC-071-1 was granting. When questioned, RPC-071-1 confirmed that the man had at one time wished for "A woman to be with me", and that he was 'just now getting around to granting it'.

Addendum 071-1: Following the death of CSD-2918 during a raid on Site-02 conducted by the "Church of Malthus" GoI, RPC-071-1 is to remain inactive until further testing is required. Usage of RPC-071-1 to attempt termination of several Gamma or higher class anomalies is pending approval by Global Command.

Researcher's Note: It appears that we've discovered two things from these interviews: One, that our friend here really is what we'd normally call a Djinn- and he possesses the wish-granting powers of one, or some semblance of them. The second, and more frustrating aspect, is that he seems to do everything in his power to avoid using them when we need him. Just our luck- we finally get a reality-bender that we can potentially control, and he'd rather sit and watch TV.

-Researcher Hamesh

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