With Walter Lughere/Atonial's (OG authors) permission I have posted an edited/redone RPC-023.
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This is the discussion related to the wiki page RPC-023.
(account deleted)The entire genus of Homo is scientifically classified as human. So, a scientist probably wouldn't write "both humans and H. Neanderthalensis". That would probably be written as either "both H. Sapiens and H. Neanderthalensis" or "both modern humans and H. Neanderthalensis".
I gave it a 4. It's fascinating and I'm hoping it will be expanded one day. It's a great start, really pulled me in. Perhaps field agents will discover more to it one day.
I'd like to add the link to the Polish translation, however, the article can't be edited by regular members due to the page lock. Could somebody with the appropriate priviledges add the following link to the rating component, please?
[[image http://rpc-pl.wikidot.com/local--files/component:icons/pl.png link="http://rpc-pl.wikidot.com/rpc-023"]]This seems interesting, but there are a few places where it could be fleshed out/changed.
First of all, one change is this: the fact that the population consists of people missing from surrounding areas seems deeply suspicious. Are they being compelled to come live in the town? Thus, this should be labelled as an Ideological Hazard.
The other location for a change is the severed human… thing, complete with a… thing. That seems like an unnecessary redaction. If its a non-anomalous human body part, I don't see why it would be redacted. At the very least, be more specific about whether or not it is an anomalous body part.
Now, for additions: the interview log is interesting, but there is another candidate for an interview who would be more obvious to target: Mr. Weaver.
For all we know, Mr. Weaver is the creator of the anomaly. Alternatively, he could just be a normal person wanting to collect the artifacts from the mine. Or maybe he's a missing person himself? The possibilities are diverse, but Mr. Weaver should be interviewed.
Finally, the mine itself seems like the perfect candidate for an exploration log. There's a whole sea down there for Christ's sake!
Honestly, with some more work to flesh it out, this place could easily become the center point of a story hub.
I wonder what sea life is down there in that 'sea' they found
This is a charming article that I enjoyed, but the concept is very under-utilized. You can't fit an entire town, a 4,000 kilometer mineshaft, and a literal sea of anomalies in under 700 words without leaving a lot of important details out.
Also, "The Mine" is a dumb title. "You know, The Mine? The only mine you'll ever hear of. Absolutely no other mines exist in real life or in the RPC canon." I was honestly under the initial impression that this would be one of those SCP-087 clones. I say lean into the corniness. Think "Mr. Weaver's Magical Mine of Mystery!"
It's cute, and I want more of this, but not in an "excited for more" sense as much as a "you really should've finished this article" sense. Either way, it's still tolerable. 4/5
Well written and interesting but sorely in need of expansion. Leaves far too many questions unanswered, and not in the good way. Why and how are people disappearing? Who is Mr. Weaver and can he be interviewed? Why is "sea" in apostrophes? Many opportunities to expand this with extra logs and content to make it great, but right now it feels incomplete.
3/5
The premise is great, it tickles your fancy enough with interesting details and potential for a great story exploring the mines, and then leaves your balls bluer than a Smurf at sea.
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