BOSONS DONE AND DUSTED ITS HEREEEE
BOSONS DONE AND DUSTED ITS HEREEEE
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There are articles that are bad and need to be scrapped, there are articles that are mediocre, there are articles that are good and meet the standard and then there are articles that are phenomenal. Then there are articles that remind you why you're here, and this article is one of them.
Its good. No notes. My one complaint is that we didn't get to see more incident logs or something showing how her reality bending powers can be volatile, I guess. But otherwise, its very solid.
Update: Just finished the final logs….
Boson once again coming outta nowhere and with just few hours until the deadline with an absolute banger. While I personally think the first part of the article could be reworded to be more digestible, specially the conprots, it doesn't harm the overall quality of the article. And that is not accounting how much of the seemingly "random" or "filler" parts of it become relevant the further you read.
Few times have I felt as invested and immersed in an article. Feeling like I'm a part of the story and not just an outside observer simply reading it. It truly felt like a mystery, and a good one at that. I thought I'd be annoyed by the puzzle, but it was actually quite cleaver and easy to guess if you know what you're looking for. Quite a fitting addition to the roaster of articles for this GoI.
The "production" value is also impressive, with nice images, videos and funny little references thrown here and there. The twist at the end absolutely threw me back once I realized what I was reading.
Impressive work, Boson!
nitpicks
In accordance with the standards of other humanoid subjects in containment onsite <— add comma 903-C will require a guard to be present at all times in the case of a breach, <— replace comma with semicolon Prolab keep their own documentation on humane procedures regarding sapient containment which can be referenced if needed.
this bit flows a bit strangely, i feel it reads better with these small tweaks
Any extreme fluctuations are to be reported to the on-site supervisor
The schedule for these activities are is to be under the discretion of Dr. Gorman
firing into the air and running from a perceived threat the witnesses couldn't could not confirm.
In all probability if RPC-903 is redesignated it will be to Neutral. did you mean neutralized here?
Frankly we are of the opinion that the recent events in Dr. Gorman's personal life have contributed to his forming of an unhealthy attachment to 903-C
which a I believe instill a distinct trend of improvement.
903-C: No Response.
this is a bit of a pet peeve of mine, but when things happening in a log are just written in italics and not put in any parentheses or brackets or whatever, it makes it read to me like the character just said what they're doing, and put emphasis on it.
Just breath breathe, just breathe.
So let me do my thing <— add comma ok?
a lot of the following nitpicks will be about the flow of sentences, sorrey
Look <— add comma if you are having nightmares, the best way to stop them is to talk through them.
I don't know <— add comma we could feel it but not quite see it.
Something, perhaps in the air, had cause caused the light from the cell's stanard standard? fixtures to shift into a red spectrum.
You and you're your clipboard and your tape recorder.
Stop trying. See you in september September.
You managed to keep the cell in tact intact this time, I think that's an improvement.
forms of women that would coalesce and hen then dissipate at random intervals.
What kind of music did he she like.
I also had a think thing for? not sure if this is just a speech quirk i'm not getting old white people music, I probably got it from her diseased genes.
thoughts
love to see a new addition to omega iota. i found myself really feeling for this girl and her plight. there truly feels like there's a real conspiracy here to unravel, there's lots of little conflicting details in this story that kept me wondering just what kind of fucked-up thing was going on here. last but not least, i was sufficiently unnerved by this article (especially the part where 903-C was describing the three-eyed dragon), just in time for october.
now, what i will say is that i'm not actually entirely sure i managed to finish reading this. hiding the video url in the poem at the end was clever, and the video itself managed to both drop more hints as to what's going on as well as creep me out a little. thing is, that's when i hit a roadblock. there definitely feels like there's more to this, and maybe there's something i'm just not getting, but i've tried figuring out where to go from the video and i have no idea. i've tried searching up stuff said in the video, the story of echo, the author longus, but there's a piece of the puzzle that keeps eluding me. idfk dude, maybe i'm looking too deep into it, maybe there's something obvious i'm missing
also there might be a genuine reason for it, the usage of the video from that one failsafe tale of yours strikes me as a little bit odd?
blabbo
/forum/t-16954789/bosons-done-and-dusted-its-hereeee#post-