Only a few minor spelling mistakes
supervising a Isko Lithium
Should be “an Isko Lithium…”
Makes your demands
Remove the S
requested an immediately administered amnestics sighting "GRP-XXX-A's
Should be something like “Requested an immediate administering of amnestics, citing “GRP-XXX-A’s…”
Not a whole lot of spelling or grammar mistakes aside from some minor errors every now and then. You did a genuinely good job of proofreading this article, that, or you just have a keen eye for these sorts of mistakes. It is this that makes me question how you have impeccable skills and then botched half of the amnestics sentence. This isn’t meant to be an insult, just a passive observation.
The idea of this creature having already predicted everything and is fighting against the heat death or have some plan relating to it is cool. The whole omniscient planner has been done several times and it’s done fairly well here. I like how the creature’s plans aren’t necessarily what’s best for everyone with them melting someone’s face off and they knew that would happen. I also like how no one makes an excuse for it. I have seen in other writings that the omniscient guy technically didn’t do anything, it was an accident, but the creature knew it was going to happen and was in a position to stop and still decided not to even though it knew it could without causing harm to itself. Everyone is very blatant in describing it as having killed a ranger, which is a nice change of pace.
I feel like the letter should not be at the top of the article. It really does spoil the entire surprise before the reader even starts getting into it. “Bet you’re wondering why this isn’t alpha-white, huh?” No I’m not because I’ve barely registered it as omega-black and haven’t even registered that it was a bunch of orbs. This should be either at the top or bottom of the addendums, preferably bottom. Instead of letting the reader slowly build an understanding of the anomaly before getting hit with the truck that is the last interview with the GD you instead give us the answers before the question was ever asked. The poor placement of the letter really took the punch out of everything else. I say put the letter at the bottom because it is an excellent summation of the article, so if a reader doesn’t get everything the letter would be there to wrap it all up in a nice bow so everyone is on the same page. I’m ragging on this so hard because the poor placement really detracted from the entire article.
Overall, a very interesting concept heavily hampered down by a slight mistake at the beginning. I did find it very cool that there was an implication that the plan could be ruined by outside factors. The entity did mention that it could say or do certain things that would change the plan, and with Baker it had mentioned it had contingency plans which you don’t do if you know your plan will 100% work. It was very subtle wording and I don’t even know if you intended it, but if you did that was impeccable work how a closer reading could draw a completely different interpretation of the entity in the orb.
As one final note, can he beat Goku tho?