RPC-363 / Discussion

This is the discussion related to the wiki page RPC-363.

Author Post

google_chrome 03 Feb 2019 03:14

This is the second place entry for the RPC-365 contest.

Last edited on 05 Feb 2019 01:18 by google_chrome Show more

(account deleted) 03 Feb 2019 21:10

Tone, grammar, and pacing need a lot of work. There are such simple typoes that it strikes me as having been hastily created.

InsectMeNot 07 Feb 2019 20:31

Well it still was better than your entry, sorry.

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InsectMeNot

Von Pincier 28 Feb 2019 01:58

I agree with Moen that this feels a little rushed. Not necessarily a bad core concept or story idea, it just needs a lot of expanding.

PathetiqueSoul 15 Jun 2019 23:04

Beautiful read. Loved it.

GrammerPoliseCheif 15 Jul 2019 06:41

It's short but alright.

You need to elaborate on why PoI-293 could not be apprehended; did she disappear down a trap door? Did she teleport out of the place with magic? Or is it because she cannot be seized as she has political/wealthy connections that would result in legal/bureaucratic trouble for the Authority if they so much as laid a hand on her?

(account deleted) 09 Jul 2020 07:22

Hi!
Does the fonts have sth wrong?
Thanks.

DoubleDenial 19 Feb 2023 14:19

It's sweet and sentimental in a way that resonated with me. 5/5