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Registered Phenomena Code: 013
Object Class: Omega-Orange
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Containment Protocols: All ACI Operatives under DEP-036 assignment for RPC-013 are to closely monitor heavily urbanized areas for reports and occurrences that fall within A-013 specified guidelines. Architectural instances of RPC-013 specified phenomena are to be dismantled and transported to the nearest ACI facility if possible. In situations where such instances are impossible to remove for any reason, operatives under DEP-022 assignment are to collectively act to disseminate as much disinformation as possible regarding the nature of the instances as to provide explanations to the general public.
Humanoid instances of RPC-013 phenomena are to be avoided in any scenario when operating in the field. Extreme situations are authorized to be handled with extreme prejudice to achieve this. In a situation where humanoid instances manifest within on-site structures, the corresponding installation should be dismantled as soon as is efficiently possible to avoid metagenetic leakage. Consequently, any on-site installations for the purposes of researching RPC-013 are to be contained within installations having a large enough radius of empty space according to Fourniér's coefficient, in order to minimize the possibility of uncontrolled architectural instances manifesting in Authority sites.
For the purposes of the safety of humanity, and to that end keeping the greater Authority running efficiently, all personnel of level 4 clearance and above are heavily discouraged from living or working in heavily urbanized areas, due to the risk of RPC-013 phenomena manifesting. Should someone on which the Authority is heavily dependent disappear due to the manifestation of RPC-013 phenomena, there could be catastrophic, possibly Black-Level consequences. This being the case, such individuals should be barred from areas where RPC-013 manifestation is a nontrivial possibility, unless required in some capacity. Due to the requirements of continued global operation, lower clearance personnel will be kept on duty in high probability RPC-013 areas, as they have to be. This is not a distinction we make lightly, but such is the nature of a hierarchical system that we must prioritize the continued existence of certain individuals over others. We hope you understand.
Description: RPC-013 is the collective designation for a group of localized phenomena taking place in an array of large urban areas over the course of several decades. Though it is currently unconfirmed, researchers operate under the assumption that such phenomena are inherent to said urban areas, given that they have never manifested in locations below a certain population density threshold. Currently only three classifications of RPC-013 instances have been observed, though it has not been ruled out that other phenomena may become observable considering the current rate of urban expansion on a global scale.
Architectural instances of RPC-013 refer to cases in which structures of an urban or otherwise artificial nature appear to spontaneously manifest within and around already urbanized areas. Currently, it is unknown how these instances form given that based on observation they can manifest within improbably short timescales. One hypothesis involves the use of humanoid instances to construct them, though humanoid instances are so comparatively rare that this is an unlikely explanation. The architectural form and style of these instances vary a nontrivial amount between manifestations, though there are commonalities. In all manifestations, instances appear in some advanced state of degradation or decay, despite the actual age of the structure in most cases not reflecting its condition. A more obvious commonality is that the structures are in nearly all cases abandoned, as they form without the knowledge of the general populace. In some exceptional instances, governments will attempt to coopt the structures for some use, keeping their spontaneous origins from the residents or consumers. Due to this it may be impossible to know with any certainty to what extent specific urban areas are actually comprised of RPC-013 instances.
Believed to be a depiction of a humanoid instance of RPC-013
Humanoid instances are currently the least understood phenomena by the Authority. This classification refers to the appearance of previously unrecorded entities of humanoid construction in urban areas, often within architectural instances. Commonalities are difficult to determine, as these instances only become accounted for in cases where they are reported by residents. According to said reports, the instances vary in presentation; certain instances are convincingly human and others' appearances are less defined. The latter are often reported as "phantoms" or "spectres", while the former are often described via suspicious sudden appearances of unknown individuals in neighborhoods or districts. Researchers have theorized that these instances are related in some capacity to the disappearances, but it has been argued that the methods of determination for both are not reliable enough to establish any form of correlation.
Far more common than architectural instances of RPC-013 are cases involving unexplained disappearances. The nature of urban environments make it exceedingly difficult to determine what portion of disappearances are instances of RPC-013, but it is estimated anywhere from 5% to 20% of unexplained disappearances in select urban areas are in fact instances of RPC-013. Unlike other classifications of RPC-013 instances, the disappearances do not share any commonalities that assist in researching them. The demographics, scenarios, times, dates, and locations of these disappearances vary wildly between cases, which some researchers use to contest the given percentage, claiming it may be much higher. The only currently effective method of determining the nature of disappearances is to cross-reference them with the manifestations of the other two instance classifications, though given that those instances have been observed occurring in isolation this is not a reliable method of determination. There is no currently agreed upon explanation for these instances outside of the Leviathan Hypothesis.
The "Leviathan Hypothesis" refers to a proposed explanation for the anomalous effects of RPC-013 based on the research of Dr. Louis Fourniér, a former research associate at Black Lake Technical Institute. The hypothesis suggests that the phenomena of RPC-013 can be explained as the result of the abiogenesis of metabiological organisms which arise from the system of commerce within urban environments. Dr. Fourniér performed extensive analysis and experimentation in regards to his Leviathan concept, and observed results strikingly similar to the phenomena referred to as RPC-013. While this explanation is outlandish, it is the only framework available by which we can understand RPC-013. For more information regarding Dr. Fourniér's research and the concept of metabiological abiogenesis, see the References section below.
Documented Manifestations
London, Great Britain [1837-1901]
Illustration depicting urban conditions at the time
Instances of phenomena correlating with RPC-013 have been observed in a variety of urban environments, though one location that has been abnormally affected would be the city of London during the "Victorian" era, in which not only the city itself but the nation as a whole underwent mass urbanization following the industrial revolution. Many intellectuals and spiritualists at the time lamented the state of urban London, citing it as an environment fit for no living creature to live in. From what we know now, these people may have been experiencing the evolution of a metabiological creature within the system of hypercommerce in the rapidly urbanizing London. Though few would disagree that even barring the Leviathan Hypothesis of RPC-013 the conditions of Victorian London were optimal for similar circumstances to that of RPC-013 phenomena to manifest.
Illustration of the figure known as "White Hood"; description matches less defined humanoid instances
Cases of disappearances were extraordinarily common in the Victorian inner city, so much so that fanciful explanations began to disseminate at increasing frequency. These fantastical stories would slowly morph into the urban legends this period was famous for, and eventually be featured in the Penny Dreadful literature that would form the basis for Gothic fiction as a genre. These grim tales of serial killers, true crime, and the like were certainly a product of the environment, though researchers have asserted the possibility that such a dark zeitgeist may have been the result of a primordial meta-organism influencing the city's collective unconscious through its existence within London's local noosphere.
The city's sensationalist publications were also home to a number of odd characters, many of which are theorized to be humanoid instances of RPC-013. The stories which appeared, both in literature and in newsprint, describe figures obscured by darkness usually by way of a hood or cloak. In some iterations they are simply animate shadows themselves. The details which have been cited as evidence of correlation with RPC-013 is that these figures are often encountered in sections of the city referred to as "decrepit" or "abandoned". Architectural instances of RPC-013 often appear to be much older than they are, so if these accounts are to be taken as truthful it may be evidence that two classifications of RPC-013 were appearing in conjunction in Victorian London.
New York City, United States [1952]
Newspaper article reporting on the discovery of RPC-013 instances in the sewer system
In early April of 1952, sewer maintenance workers in the Lower East Side of Manhattan discovered a series of seemingly man-made structures resembling basements and hallways in tunnels beneath the neighborhood. At the time the news was comparatively sensational, though it fell from relevance after a period of several days. Exploring the structures, maintenance workers found that they were severely degraded, correlating with the known properties of architectural instances of RPC-013. Reports indicate that the area had also been experiencing an increase in unexplained disappearances and strange figures, which is indicative that RPC-013 phenomena had indeed manifested.
While an otherwise trivial instance of RPC-013 manifestation, what makes this specific case important is that it notified the American Intelligence community to the group of phenomena that would become RPC-013. Following the discovery the CIA became interested in the case, codenamed "Window Shade", and conspired with the Smithsonian Institution to acquire the structures and transport them to an undisclosed location for testing. Considering that at the time, the Smithsonian had jurisdiction over anomalous phenomena, it's likely the CIA was aware of the implications of the discovery. During the Smithsonian Audit the Authority was given access to a number of classified documents in the Smithsonian Archive, below are documents related to this event.
Report on operation to acquire RPC-013 related materials
Letter regarding experimentation on RPC-013 related materials
Report regarding experimentation on RPC-013 related materials
From the contents of these documents, analysts theorize that the CIA was attempting to utilize RPC-013 as a method to covertly construct bases on foreign territory. It should be noted that the documents of this case were available to Dr. Fourniér during his tenure in New York as a research intern. It was likely the information regarding this event that became the basis for his later research.
Naruhama, Japan [1984]
Frame of the Night Scoop footage
In the mid-eighties, a Japanese television program known as Detective Night Scoop (探偵!ナイトスクープ) began airing, the premise being TV personalities investigating viewer submitted mysteries live on air. During a 1984 episode, the hosts received a submission from a young viewer in Naruhama (a small community on the outskirts of Tokyo) regarding an odd occurrence. The viewer's letter describes an abnormal abandoned structure on the shoreline off of Motosuka Beach. He mentions uncanny figures that he has never seen before wandering around the beach and entering the building without ever seeming to exit.
The show's hosts sent their investigator Yoshito to Naruhama, where he gives a slightly comedic interview with the young viewer, before setting off to the beach. Upon finding the structure, the child becomes immediately uncomfortable, though Yoshito retains his jovial attitude. While Yoshito is approaching the building, the hosts are investigating building permits for the area and discover that none have been filed. When the hosts discover photographs of the area from two weeks prior showing an absence of any structures, the broadcast is cut off. As far as is visible in the episode, it is unknown whether or not Yoshito ever entered the structure.
It is suspected that Japanese Prime Minister Nakasone Yasuhiro’s 1984 visit to China, and the general warming of Sino-Japanese relations in 1984 may be a result of the Japanese government requesting assistance from PCAAO regarding the Night Scoop incident. The structure has not been documented anywhere following the event.
Arabian Penninsula [2009]
One of the photos captured by a member of the Special Reconnaissance Regiment
In 2009, while on deployment to Yemen and Somalia to combat an Al-Queda insurgency, members of the British Air Service and the Special Reconnaissance Regiment came across several abandoned, half-constructed buildings in the Arabian Desert. Upon communication with their superiors, it was revealed that there was no record of them. One member of the SRR managed to take a few photographs before the group moved closer to investigate. Upon entering the perimeter of the structures, the team was attacked and an armed skirmish with several humanoid instances of RPC-013 followed. Eventually the servicemen were ousted from the area, suffering three casualties. This is the only known case in which RPC-013 instances have been outwardly hostile.
Luckily, several of the Special Reconnaissance Regiment members were deep cover Authority operatives, and notified the Authority as soon as they could. The Air Service members spread the story quickly, and so ACI disseminated a cover story in order to halt the spread in a timely fashion. This event marks the Authority's first encounter with any RPC-013 phenomena, and the area has remained relatively dormant in the subsequent years.
What follows are selected excerpts from "The Fourniér Documents: Dissertations on the Metabiology of Urbanization and Hypercommerce and its Relation to the Entropy of Naturally Occurring Environments", a posthumous compilation of recovered research papers, personal journals, and official documents from the former Black Lake Technical Institute prior to event A8-035, published via the Authority archives. Mostly focusing on Dr. Fourniér's research into his "Leviathan" theory of urban metabiogenesis, the excerpts will include pieces of Fourniér's writing from both his research documents and unfinished memoirs. Included are relevant excerpts from the personal written journals of Fourniér's close friend at BTI, Dr. Anderson, as well as some pieces written by Dr. Julie Nguyen.
For access to the full Fourniér Documents, contact the office of Site Director Magnússon at the former BTI campus (now Site-025-OL).
I had that dream again.
You can't really describe dreams, with any accuracy. But I find it interesting how often I have this one. I don't really "get" why we're being asked to write these journals, though I admit it is kind of therapeutic. Hope I spelled that right.
In any case, Anderson came by today. He was excited about something or other, I can only tell half the time. He asked me if I wanted to come down to eat with him and Julie, I refused. It is amusing, how quickly his mood shifts when things don't go his way, it seemed like he might actually get angry with me, but he left after trying to get me to reconsider for the better part of 15 minutes.
I understand why he does it, though. He thinks I'm too focused on my work. He's right, to an extent.
My work is all I have.
The first few pages of Fourniér's memoirs are rather mundane descriptions of his morning, though there is significant evidence he attempted to start the memoir multiple times. His memoirs don't cover his research in much detail, which is where his research papers become extremely helpful.
IV. Axioms of Metabiology
The work of many has gone into the burgeoning field of metabiology, the work of microbiologists and sociologists, organic chemists and the like. The most basic definition available refers to biological systems whose components are comprised of separate biological systems being of a lower order. However, "order" in this context is ill defined. Through rough experimentation I have found that in terms of complexity, meta-organisms tend to be much simpler than the systems that make up their components. This could be for a number of reasons, though I find it likely that this is a result of meta-organisms simply being bound to the same evolutionary timescales as us physical creatures. When a meta-organism first appears, it is similar to abiogenesis, the entity is on par with the simplest primordial organisms because it simply has not evolved yet, despite it existing within a far more complex system.
What experimentation Fourniér has done is expanded upon in later documents, but the Axioms excerpt is from one of his earliest published works. It is an example of how early in the timeline Fourniér was focused on the research of metabiology.
Fucking Chairman, piece of shit
asking us to keep "journals", if I wanted to do that I'd have done it already. not like he doesn't check up on my research ALL the GODDAMN TIME. Louis is probably loving it, that guy could write his way through the Sahara Desert. Actually, I'll be honest, it's kinda frustrating. It's actually excruciatingly interesting. The man is impossible to really wrap one's head around. Despite being a French national, the guy has an infuriating command of English, and yet he has such little grasp of his own language he can barely pronounce his own last name. I get he was raised in the States but it can be obnoxious at times. Though, I've been thinking of asking him to help me with my dissertations on my dream research, so at least his skill may be helpful there. I just wish he'd come out of his shell more
Dr. Anderson's writings appear not to start until much later in the timeline, and it is much more obvious in this piece that the Chairman of BTI was encouraging the researchers to keep journals for an unknown reason. Dr. Anderson's journal excerpts can provide us some insight as to Fourniér's character and the general environment of BTI at the time.
Note. The term "Leviathan"
I have been asked, on certain occasions to explain my reasoning for the term "Leviathan" outside of the obvious Hobbes allusion, what sense does it make? Well I hate to disappoint, but it came to me in a dream, while in New York. I don't enjoy discussing my time in that place, but to speak frankly, the term seemed to fit perfectly with my experiences there. I'll leave it at that and move on.
To do list:
1. refromat data from recent dream surveys
2. reattempt dream-translation
3. grab food from break room (avoid chairman)
4. check dream surveys again (i may have missed something)
5. eat food
6. go to lake with Louis (even if he says hes too busy)
7. if the dream translation was successful, celebrate!
7. if not, try it again : (
I went down to the lake with Anderson today. I can see why the chairman built this place on the lake, its quite striking. Though, there are never any birds or fish in it. Anderson was telling me all about how the Vikings used to call it "Svartavatnið", the black lake. He went on about the strange occurences in its histroy, though I wasn't quite listening. He was especially excited to get a sample of the water. The name is quite accurate, that water is incredibly black. I've hypothesized on why this was for a while, perhaps abnormally large carbon content, leaking in from somewhere. Once I attempted to ask the Chairman, but the man was cagey as ever. I can understand maintaining anonymity, the entire point of this institute is to allow researchers to work, even when their labors are shunned by the scientific community. But he has always been like this, and it unnerves me greatly.
Once Anderson had collected a few vials of the water, I wanted to go back inside, but he persuaded me to stay out for a bit longer. After a bit, Julie came out as well. Anderson suggested the three of us set up camp to observe the lake for some days, to see if we could form a hypothesis as to why no animals were attracted to the lake. Julie shut him down pretty quickly and they got into their normal argument, him saying she had no sense of discovery, her calling him a child, etc. I suppose this has become pretty standad for us, but I can't help but laugh thinking on it. I'm at least glad to be in a much better place than when I arrived here.
II. Experimentation
In order to see if I could observe a metabiogenesis in real time, I attempted to create a computer simulation of a city. My programming knowledge is limited, but I was assisted by Dr. Nguyen. It will be far less complex than in physical space, but I have set program loops for each unit representing a "person" where they exchange information, and "move" from place to place. If my hypothesis is correct, and it is human beings as units of information that form the discrete cells of the Leviathan, I should observe, after a few short weeks, the formation of anomalies that align with what I've observed in real cities. This would be units disappearing, and new units appearing, which is something I haven't programmed. I made sure, as well, to add a specific tag for the pre-determined "death" of a unit, so if one disappears outside of that it will be recorded.
I guess if I can't be honest anywhere else about this, I can be honest here. I really don't dislike Julie, but she can be such a bore! this world is filled with such fantastical things to discover but she can be such a stick in the mud! I'll give an example.
Of all the strange and wondrous mysteries that are studied here at BTI, one that continues to fascinate me is this: how does a Canadian woman whose skin is white as the driven snow, manage to a acquire the surname Nguyen? As far as I know, Julie's parents are both white as well, so how has this family mutated an ethinically Vietnamese surname? While at lunch today I asked her about her family history, trying to get to the bottom of this, but she shut me down at every turn! Is she not even curious? not even a little? She just kept jotting down notes with that stupid red pen of hers! it's so annoying!
Anyway my theory is witness protection, I'll be testing this hypothesis soon.
Despite Anderson being at his core such a petulant baby, this isn't what irritates me so much about him. The man's curiosity has gotten him far in his field of research, but it intrigues me at times how misdirected this instinct is. Like the fact that he is so indignant to me about being so non-forthcoming with my deep family history, and yet never once being so pushy about Louis' past. Outside of his childhood in Vermont, we know virtually nothing about the past of our mutual friend. But Anderson never considers this, he's just so protective of him. The thought to ask never even enters mind, despite his enthusiasm bursting at the seams for any other topic. Don't get me wrong, I know why. But one can only tolerate a certain amount of cognitive dissonance, you know?
Not to mention, again, prodding me about being cagey? This coming from a man who has us call him by his last name just because his first name is "embarassing"! What a crock of shit!
I keep having the dreams. I thought that if I left the city, it would leave me alone, but these thoughts have been following me for years now. It's true they drive my work, but it is a crushing weight to see laid out so clearly before you the nightmare humanity is walking to so blindly. What makes it worse is knowing that no matter how hard you work there's nothing you can do to stop it.
Sketch in the margins, likely depicting the first dream.
Anderson and Julie had were bickering again today. He read her diary, trying to "investigate" her last name. He said that in it she had been idly pondering on my own past. She was quick to damage control, but I can understand why she feels that way. I confess being so insular in all my time here at BTI has left some of my relationships strained, but its just so difficult, discussing my time in New York. Those grueling years affronted by the most barbaric and dismaying shades of humanity for all that time. I noticed, while living there, that the residents cope by over time becoming numb to the horror looming over them. Maybe that's why I am like this, the numbness just never set in. The dreams, which started in New York, are of a city (I'm sure you are not surprised). One is of a city wreathed in flame, a mutated skyline with little distinction between buildings, one might say its all one form, a unified entity burning. I can hear the people screaming, but despite all the windows the monolithic city has no doors, they are trapped lest they want to jump. The peculiar thing is that among all this chaos, in the dream its always snowing. I can't fathom why.
Another sketch, likely the second dream.
The other dream is of me, standing in a space between four urban walls (another singular, neverending building), but when I look up, they extend upward forever into the darkness. It's a foreboding dark, like that of space. I wonder, is that where the dream is? Is this a dream of a universe consumed by the Leviathan, where all humanity has been numbed, building ever upward and outward until all things have achieved optimum urban entropy? Where we are the end of existance? In these dreams, sometimes I'll see, in the window, those strange two symbols from the Chairman's ring. I hope it isn't an ominous portent.
I have no doubt that these are visions given to me by the Leviathan, but why?
Is it simply because I was never numb?
I think I will tell Julie and Anderson about New York.
I really hate the weather here in Iceland. The incessant fog can be nice, but now that we're in winter and it's snowing, it's just too cold for me. Louis can't get enough of it though. It reminds him of Vermont. He once told me that was the happiest he'd ever been, on that farm in the cold and snow. Though I guess I understand more now why he hates the heat. Apparently there were annual heat waves while he was in New York, so I guess he just associates the heat with whatever was happening to him there. He said when he looked back at New York he saw it as one big cremation oven, "People only go in once they are already dead, and it burns whatever is left of them to ash."
I don't know statements like that seem a bit dark and heavy handed, but I let him sulk like that when he's in a mood. I once asked him if he hated just New York, or all cities. He said "rotten apples have the same decay at their core, no matter the color on the outside."
So, yeah, I know he needs emotional support but I think I'll stop asking questions about New York for now.
H. Analysis and Conclusions
Based on the results of the first few experiments, the predicted results failed to materialize. However, once I constructed the to-scale model of an urban environment, adding in each "room" component a set of transistors for each data unit to "occupy", the anomalies in the system began to take shape after several weeks. Due to the limits of my programming, the anomalies do not have the level of scale as those observed out in real cities, but given a system that is 1-1 with the real world one imagines that the anomalies would resemble much more those observed in New York and other urban centers. By this metric the Leviathan experiment has been deemed a success.
The implications of this discovery are rather staggering. That not only the concentration of people in these centers but also the geometry of repeating rectangular tessilate compartments can induce metabiogenesis is rather troubling. This implies the hypercommerce of the urban environment serves as potent "primordial soup" which encourages meta-organisms to evolve within a cities collective noosphere. This begs an almost terrifying question: given the average organism's propensity to shape its environment into one more suitable for its survival and reproduction, how much of our drive to urbanize is truly our own?
Despite my research finally being vindicated, I do not feel any better. I, in fact, only feel worse. Anderson has attempted to cheer me up, telling me that I should celebrate, but I am guilty to say that he has done little to help my demeanor. Despite my apparent victory, I feel no sense of relief, in fact for the past few days I have felt nauseous. Have I desired, all this time, to be proven wrong? To be shown that in fact no, humanity's very drive for creation has not led to an increasing portion of the population becoming mere components of some alien meta-organism existing in the plane above ours, using its position in that environment to slowly drive us to terraform the earth and the universe into an entropic urban hellscape just so that it may reproduce infinitely! The humble protein cannot perceive in its smallness, the organism that its daily activities serve to continue the existence of. We are the proteins of the Leviathan, our bodies its particles and our thoughts its DNA. Humanity, in its never ceasing drive for progress, has developed a new form of barbarism so cruel and inane that it has outgrown its need for us and become autonomous!
The irony is that we could have prevented it. These cities, toward which these Leviathans lurch to be born, could have been dismantled, in fact they may have never been built! But we believe ourselves to only be animals of circumstance, of chance. If there is even a minute possibility that a horrible tragedy will not happen, when it does we inevitably lay blame on probability, on bad luck. Never taking into account whatever we may have done to exacerbate that minute possibility.
No, there is no fate. We make our own bad luck. We create our own misfortune.
Shortly before Incident A8-035, Dr. Fourniér was removed from his position at BTI by the Board for unspecified reasons. He was allowed to stay on the staff, so on paper it was recorded as a demotion rather than a termination. Despite this, close coworkers of Fourniér described it as a firing in their personal writings.
I'm convinced this is some kind of hack job. You know, Anderson would always try to convince me the Board was up to some suspicious things, that they were corrupt and at any moment something would happen that would make it obvious. I would always sternly say that he was much too paranoid, but now I can't help but take him more seriously. To fire someone right after their greatest success is such a baffling move, I can't even comprehend what their motive could have been. And I pride myself in being able to see through others.
You know I truly believe that Louis is the smartest of all of us. He's certainly published more than the rest of us but that's not what matters. There's a wisdom to him, something under the surface so many of us lack. I don't know what we'd do without him.
I can't help but feel like its something to do with his research. Do they want it silenced? I can't figure it out. Of course Louis is dejected, he hasn't left his quarters since the announcement. Maybe I'll have to finally take up Anderson on his offer to investigate the board.
I've been pacing for the better part of a few hours now trying to think. This is a new level. Julie could make me angry, but at this point I'm far beyond that. Louis gave EVERYTHING to these people, and they've spat in his face! What fucking shitheads! What absolutely detestable pieces of shit! I can't even come up with insults that are to scale with how I feel.
Louis hasn't left his place in days. I just wish there WAS SOMETHING I could do to help him.
I'll get on the Board. If I get a position on the Board I could put forward a motion to reinstate him! It's perfect! The Chairman always said he was particularly interested in my research too! Now he has hinted that if I wanted a promotion I'd need to access the Deep. But what he doesn't know is that my tests with the lakewater have been a success! I may be just on the verge of the Deep if I work nonstop for the next few days!
Louis, this is for you.
I can remember what she was like. How it sounded when she spoke, how joy radiated from her when she smiled. I can remember the way she made me feel, but I can't
really remember her, as she was. Memory is faulty. There are constants, things unchanging in time or space, that can't be transcribed in memories. Paradoxically,
the most important things are the ones we can never remember. And so she and the others remain, a half-formed blurry image, which seems complete enough until I try to fill in the gaps. They're forever lost from me, true visages as far from me as the memory of a single flake of snow.
It did snow in New York. For one day, it snowed. It was the day I left.
I have a vision of them, in the snow. They stand together among the falling white, a silhouettes against the wintry canvas, excitedly welcoming me back with open arms. The snow that so permeated my youth, cruelly now obscures them.
I wonder sometimes, if I had left them to die. It drives me mad, thinking of that. Not that I could have protected them from the things that are birthed in that place.
In my note, I instructed them to leave the city, because I wanted them to escape. But I so often have to imagine that in righteous anger and sadness they ignored my warning.
Other times I imagine that they don't think of me anymore.
Sometimes in my visions I see among them a new child, in the snow. Obscured, as they are, but still there. I cannot see the child's face.
Casey, I'm leaving my memoirs with you. You and Julie look after them, and try not to linger on my memory. You can drive yourself mad trying to recapture what you lost
One day the child's face will be clear to me. One day, one day.
Ecological Hazard
Sentient Hazard
Immeasurable Hazard
Tychokinetic Hazard
Mind-Control Hazard
