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Registered Phenomena Code: XX

Object Class: Alpha-White

Hazard Types: Sentient, Sapient (?), Mechanical, Aggression

Containment Protocols: RPC-XX is currently kept in the LO Anomalous Storage Lockers of Site-016. Dossiers produced by RPC-XX are distributed among personnel for comedic purposes.

Description: RPC-XX is an Underwood Touch-Master 5 typewriter. While unobserved, RPC-XX manifests a sheet of paper through currently unknown means and proceeds to type of its own accord onto the sheet.

While this process varies wildly in the time taken to produce it and the content thereof, eventually RPC-XX "ejects" the sheet of paper from itself and is rendered inert for several weeks. This sheet of paper, dubbed RPC-XX-A, is normally an entirely fictional and generally poorly-formatted attempt at an official Authority document.

While their substance is rarely, if ever, consistent, RPC-XX-A instances are universally incredibly ridiculous in their implications, highly irreverent to Authority protocols and procedures, and possesses little to no understanding of the titles and terminology used by Authority personnel.

Addendum 1: Documented RPC-XX-A Instances

  • RPC-341 - AMALGAMATE, Or Children of Wrath

Amalgamate was the first actual SCP I ever started working on, and is the first draft I submitted to their greenlight forum. It never got greenlit whatsoever, but I had a strange affection for it given my love/fear of body horror and other more personal issues. I unironically enjoy this one, and I'm forever amazed that I managed to get it up, given everything that happened between it being written and it being posted here.

Its original working title was Cronenbaby. I think it was pretty funny.

  • RPC-YYY - ERLKOENIG, Or The Threat of Predestination

This one hasn't been posted yet, but it was what almost led to me being an SCP author instead of an RPC one. After AMALGAMATE wasn't well received, I put this one up on the forums and it was greenlit twice and approved of in a few days. In fact, I got a few popular SCP authors to look and it and they LIKED IT. I was over the moon.

Then that happened. Put a wrench in things. Definitely took a good look at the SCP community.

I decided not to stick around. I still haven't been able to work on ERLKOENIG for a long time.

  • RPC-611 - WRAITH, Or The Antidote to the Human Condition

611 is a tough one to go over. After I posted 341, something else came up, and among other things, led to me leaving the RPC community for a little while. My brother was the one who actually came up with the basic idea of ghosts in an abandoned Russian city, and the idea of a German scientist causing it, and the rest became a very drawn out analysis of an anomaly that ends with it deciding it wanted to blow itself up.

The execution of my articles tends to be what brings them down, in the end, and I think 611 is a painfully obvious example of just that.

  • RPC-612 - MONUMENT, Or History Without A Home

612 is admittedly an attempt to appease my strange desires for alternate history, and MONUMENT proved an excellent, albeit shoddily executed, canvas. Most of the ideas that pop into my head practically write themselves, often in a bad way. There isn't too much to say about 612 once you're done reading it.

  • RPC-613 - PASIGRAPH, Or Rise and Rend Asunder

"Rise and rend asunder, ye old kings of Babylon." That's what PASIGRAPH spawned from, and the word Pasigraph itself I got from "Children of Dune" by Frank Herbert. 613 was originally going to be grander and I had an MST planned who specialized in translation via RPC-613-B, and there was going to be a tale of RPC-613-A breaking out and going on a crusade against the Authority and-

It was too much. In the end, it felt like it was just rotting in my sandbox and I felt like I had to post it. Ultimately, it was dissapointing. Another article to rewrite later.

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